Somehow Saturdays have been sneaking up on me lately. I jot down notes and plan my posts, but as soon as Saturday hits I’m suddenly unprepared, disorganized and very sleepy. Today is no different!
I’ve been lazy with my daily drawing. I still draw in my sketchbook almost every day (and on the days that I don’t it’s because I’ve been drawing digitally instead) but it feels like I’m sidetracking and procrastinating instead of studying and improving. Might have something to do with this month’s subject matter (RedditGetsDrawn posts, even though I end up not posting most of them) or it might be the guilt, slowly chewing its way through me. Basically, whenever I’m not working on Boonka I feel I’m avoiding work on purpose. And since I’m able to dedicate only a few hours a day to my animation project, I’m feeling pretty guilty most of the day: Oh no, I’m sleeping instead of drawing the model sheet, watching a show instead of getting that background done… Oh the horror of drawing yet another “meh” portrait instead of working out the next keyframe!
Needless to say, this isn’t doing wonders to my general state of mind. There is also a bunch of non-art-related things going on in my life currently that isn’t helping matters either, and with everything combined I don’t feel in control of my own self anymore, which is frustrating and annoying at best.
This is, however, just a phase. It’s that time towards the end of the year where the new and seductive beginning is nearly within my grasp, so abandoning things and giving up feels somewhat justified, because I’m going to try so hard and do much better starting January 1st 2018… If only it worked that way. It’s so tempting to start things afresh next year – be a new, better, more productive me! And once the year starts but the magic doesn’t happen for some reason, I can always start to be better next month, next week.. tomorrow? With a pretty Bullet Journal spread and everything!
I’ve long learned that the way to go is to start right now. If anything, this gives me more time to plan and try out the pretty BuJo spreads with which I’ll fill my journal next year. I’ve got a lot of animating to do before December ends, and Boonka isn’t going to draw herself. Speaking of which, here’s this week’s Project Boonka episode: